英语高手请进！！

1. 去掉According to
2. University College London 是什么机构？有University 就不用College了吧？
3.young, 逗号改成句号
4.these people heart attacks and strokes among those who mostly.改成
these people are at the greatest risk of heart attacks and strokes.
5.In this regard 改成 consequently
6. scientists believe that when people, when bored, it is easy to develop bad habits such as smoking, drinking, leading to reduced life expectancy. 改成scientists believe that it is easy for people to develop bad habits such as smoking, drinking, leading to reduced life expectancy when they are boring.
7. First of all, to develop改成 First of all, remember to develop
8. to relax and free, so you will not be easily bored,改成if you are relaxed and free, you will not be easily bored. therefore ,the body will be more and more healthy.

你是用软件翻译的吧？语法太多错误了